TEMECULA, CA—Local teenager Melody Gonzalez felt an array of emotions Sunday, but primarily rage, upon receiving her Starbucks Coffee with a name scribbled other than her own, sources confirmed.
“I was tweeting, but I definitely remember telling the worker-person that my name is Melody, not Melanie,” said Melody. “I know my own name.”
Insisting that her fight-or-flight response kicked in, Melody immediately posted a photograph of the incident to every form of social media imaginable with a caption that read, “LOL MELANIE !?!?” and an emoji symbolizing that she was crying from laughing so hard at the inexcusable blunder.
“There were at least eight people behind me, it was noisy, machines were whirring, and when I saw just how badly that corporate slave butchered my name, I was forced to make a scene,” said Melody. “If I don’t stand up for the precise phonetics of my name to strangers then nobody will.”
At press time, sources reported that Melody feels largely responsible for a new era of social justice after a surplus of teenage girls from high school liked and even favorited her social media posts.